in�ef�fec�tu�al

Pronunciation: "i-n&-'fek-ch&(-w&)l, -'feksh-w&l
Function: adjective

1 : not producing the proper or intended effect : FUTILE
2 : INEFFECTIVE

I thought I'd start out this entry a little differently, by picking a single word from the dictionary, in this case webster.com, that described almost perfectly how I'm feeling at this moment. Who knew that a single word could so accurately describe almost every aspect of my life.

For instance take my love life, or lack thereof. For someone who claims to enjoy the companionship of females especially sexual companionship I've actually done very little in the way of attracting and maintaining female companionship. This is not a recent development, if anything almost this entire diary can easily serve as testament to how ineffectual I am with the opposite sex. If anything, I feel like I'm under some kind of curse when it comes to females. Lately, the most obvious manifestation of this "curse" is that almost every woman I've ever been attracted to has been "unavailable", meaning they are entangled in some relationship or they reside in a place to far for me to reach.

Sometimes it even both and even more like: "I like you as a person but I don't date men because I'm a lesbian" not that there's anything wrong with that, because people should be able to have relationships with whatever gender he or she feels drawn to. Still, this is of no help to derrick who is in need of some sweeeeet luv. The "curse" has been in place for the past few years, before I even began this diary and has shown no signs of reversing like it did for the BoSox (holy fuck I hope it's not going to take THAT long). But yeah, OK I admit it, derrick is ineffectual with women. I have no power to sway women's hearts or vaginas. Well OK maybe I know how to rock the vagina's world, but I think I have to get to their heart first before I can even get close to their vaginas. At least that's my theory.

As far as my career goes, I have definitely seen better days. I know there's a job somewhere out there waiting for someone of my talent but for the moment the job search thus far has proven to be an exercise in frustration. I thought my recently acquired degree would give me the edge I needed to put me over the top, but for the moment it seems to almost be a non-factor. I have faith that it will ultimately be of use to me in my career, but for right now it's not even even getting me in the door for an interview and it's fucking pissing me off to the point where I want to punch my fist through the fucking wall. But yeah, the word of the day applies here too. Derrick is feeling quite ineffectual in terms of his career.

As for my business venture beyondZINE.com let's just say it is off to a very, very slow start. You could say it is almost at a standstill. Granted, I haven't begun writing articles for that site yet, but almost everything else is in place. The problem is that my website hasn't been indexed by google or yahoo yet. If it hasn't been indexed it won't show up in search engines and if it doesn't show up in search engines people won't visit my site killing any chances of them seeing the ads on there and clicking on such ads as potential customers. So until it gets indexed and crawled by the search engines my site is pretty much dead in the water, or if you want to use today's word, ineffectual. I'm not exactly sure what I can to to get the site indexed faster but all I can think of is to start the articles rolling. I figure the more content and the better quality of content the better chance it has to get indexed.

Why do things have to be so complicated. I'm just a squirrel trying to get a nut. Someone please throw me a fucking nut, before I fucking go nuts! *AHEM* So anyway my health is a little better. I still have a mild cough and the minor thought irritation that comes with it so I guess I've quit smoking until that all goes away. I did some research on the weed smoking and how to "pass" a piss test. Holy fuck there's a lot of crap out there on the internet and lots of so-called "cures", but I did stumble upon one really informative resource http://my.marijuana.com/content.php3, which contains all the information you ever wanted to know about weed but were probably afraid to ask.

In a nutshell, a metabolized form of THC, the part of weed that gets you high, can stay in your system for up to 30 days because it sticks to your fat cells. The metabolized THC won't get you high because it's already broken down, but it is slowly released into your bloodstream when you burn fat and it can cause a positive result in a urine test. Probably the best way to prepare for a urine test if you know you have smoked within the past 30 days is to stop burning fat. If you exercise regularly, stop working out about a week before the test to stop the flow of the burnt fat and thus the possible THC trapped in the fat, at least until the test. Consuming natural diuretics such as cranberry juice will also help clear the bloodstream of THC. Be sure to take vitamin supplements especially the Vitamin B's a day or two before the test to keep the color in your urine. If it comes out totally clear (like after a night of heavy drinking), they may reject the sample. It's also a good idea to eat some meat to boost your createne levels to keep your urine sample close to normal as well. If you read the article you may find other tips as well. Anyway, I've babbled on long enough. Until next time...