Hi, I'm derrick and I'm fucking drunk... I though I'd kick off an entry inebriated since I haven't done so in ages. Anyway, the reason I'm bombed is because my ex is getting married later today. That's as good a reason as any isn't it? Well, it's good enough for me.

Really, it's fucking weird, I won't go into details because I'm fucked up, but I had me a few shots of vodka, then I want to a local bar and had me a few more drinks, then I went to White Castle and had me several jalapeno cheeseburgers w/ fries and a large Harold & Kumar sized cup drink, then I made it slowly to my garage and parked then watered the garden with my piss, then I ate the jalapeno cheeseburgers, fries and drink then later bowed to the porcelain god and projectile vomited white castle, vodka and water flavored fluid, like several times, felt better, brushed my teeth had myself a semi-weekend.

Now why do you ask have I gone though such lengths to defile myself? The answer is simple. My ex-wife is getting herself married later this fine Sunday morning/afternoon. I thought it would be in my best interest to saturate myself with liquor for this momentous event. Anyway, in a few hours it will all be over and that will be that.

My trip to Canada is more or less set. Old, Daddy-o called me to say that he is planning to drive from St. Louis (where he lives) to Chicago (where I live) which is a 4 hour trip to pick me up this Saturday. I'll then take over and drive to Detroit which is like another 4 hours. Then it's to Windsor, then to Toronto, like another 4 hours if the traffic is decent. A 12 hour road trip more or less. I wonder how that will all work out, but still, it doesn't matter, it's Derrick's makeshift vacation. How cool is that? I don't expect my cell phone to be working outside the US, so if I fall off the face of the map for the week or so, it's because I'm WAY out of cell phone range. I expect to be back in the Windy City circa August 22 or 23 2004 A.D.

In other news I changed my Grandpa's diaper for the first time in my life. My aunt, who has been doing that particular task for the past week was working the late shift on Saturday night and Grandpa, let's just say was overflowing. This may sound silly but my mom, is technically an RN, but she's more or less squeamish about doing medical related stuff that she focused her career on the administrative side of medicine. Now this is all well and good, aside from the fact that she was reluctant to do the diaper change even though this was something she did before w/ grandpa.

So I basically stepped up to the plate and changed Grandpa's diaper. It's basically like changing a baby's diaper but on an adult scale. I of course got help from the fellow grandchildren, my sister and my cousin. I did most of the nasty work and they helped changed the sheets and what not. The main significance of this act is that I overcame my own trepidation of doing this particular deed, I mean if I did it once, I can most likely do it again and again.

What worries me however, is when I am gone for vacation and school and whatever else that will keep me away. Who's going to take care of the big G? Someone no doubtedly will, but I'm not sure it will be to the same attention to detail as perhaps I would. *sigh* Anyway, I'll cross that bridge when I get to it. For now it's time to crash...