The past couple of weeks have been draining both physically and mentally. I was able to shake off the cold in about 3 days thanks to those new herbal effervescent tablets called Airborne Formula invented by a teacher who was sick of getting sick because she was constantly exposed to sick kids in the classroom. She's probably a multi-millionaire by now. =p I also took Theraflu Cold and Cough to relieve the existing symptoms.

The Midterms kicked my ass though, I spent two weekends ago cramming for one class and last weekend working on my midterm project for my other class. I even took the day off last Monday to work on the user interface for the webpage I was developing for the project. I was in front of my PC for 9 hours straight, I didn't even get up to take a piss. It was crazy. =p Anyway I got a 90/100 on the Midterm Exam. Although I have yet to score 100% on a major exam in my college career, I guess that will just have to do. Hopefully I got a decent score on the midterm project of my other class as well. I'm still waiting on my grade for that one. Although it wasn't the most functional, it was easily one of the best websites in my class in terms of layout.

Of course if I really want that perfect score and not burn personal/sick days at work, I should probably cease the weekend party activity during times of major exams so I have more time to cram and do project work. But then again, a guy needs some way to relax and unwind and all work and no play makes Derrick a dull boy so we'll have none of that talk.

I mentioned a few things in my last entry, one of those things was an offline blog entry I've been composing on and off for the past month or so. It's pretty much me venting out all the crap I've been feeling lately. The entry started to reach too far back into my past, turning into a mini-novel, kind of like James Frey's much so-called and criticized "memoir" A Million Little Pieces, but not as interesting and not nearly as much embellishment. Ultimately, I decided not to post because I'm just a mere blogger and not a novel writer, plus I don't have the time or energy to organize such a large amount of my flow of thought into an easily readable and chronologically correct format.

Still, while I was composing the entry I was able to both vent and piece together my life and make a little sense of it all, even if it was only to my self. Basically, I was feeling down about my life. The fact that I've been single for a really long time has always been a contributing factor to how I feel, even though I've already decided, at least since the New Year, that I'm not quite ready for the whole relationship thing.

Although I tried to dig deeply to find out what was really eating at me, the answer to what was eating at me was actually quite simple. After I had gotten laid off almost two years ago, I had to make a few concessions and lifestyle changes to cope with my lack of income. One of those concessions was moving back with my family so I could finish school. Of course a few things have happened since then and now. I completed my Bachelor's back in November of 2004 and regained full-time employment last February of 2005 and I started classes for my Master's degree last September 2005.

Though things in my life started falling back on track, slowly but surely, one bothersome fact remained, I'm a thirty-something guy still living with his family. Never mind the fact that once upon a time they moved in with me shortly after my divorce and that I eventually moved to my own bachelor pad as time progressed, the fact that I had to move back, not only in my Grandfather's building where I once lived, but in the same 3-bedroom unit as my mom and sister kind of bummed me out.

I know at first it was a necessity because I had no job and I could not pay the mortgage of the condo of my bachelor pad. Fortunately at the time, my step dad had broken up with his girlfriend, moved out of her place and was looking for a place to stay, so he moved into my bachelor pad and helped with the payments. So the question remains, now that I'm back to full time work and school, why am I still living with my family?

I really had no solid answer to that question other than my mind was focused on other things and ultimately I was too lazy to do anything about it. So now I'm kind of feeling like Matthew McConaughey's character in that upcoming movie "Failure to Launch", the one about the thirty-something guy who still lives with his parents and refuses to move out, except I'm not quite as cute, charming or even remotely successful with the females as his character was and of course I want to get my ass out while he was quite comfortable with his living arrangement.

That shit kind of got to me a little so the wheels started turning in my mind, how the fuck am I going to get my ass out of here? I was kind of crossing my fingers hoping my step-dad would find another girlfriend to move in with so I could reclaim my downtown bachelor pad, but no such luck with that. Then it dawned on me, there's a relatively new dorm in my school put up in downtown and I could grab a studio for $16K for an entire school year, which comes with a meal plan plus all of the buildings amenities. I know it's a little pricey, but the biggest advantage was that I could put the cost for the whole year on student loan and spend the rest of my scholastic career living downtown in relative style. Yeah, I know it's a college dorm, a far cry from the former glory of my downtown bachelor pad, but at least won't be that 30 year old guy still living with his mom.

Then my mom had gotten wind of my plan, which I was expecting some kind of resistance from her, because I'm making almost as much as she is nowadays and I'm helping with a shit load of expenses. Hell, she's using my car to drive to work which I paid off with my own money. Since I started working again she started charging me my "share" of everything, utilities, groceries, gas, the whole 9 yards, even though I helped support the family when she was out of work and between jobs for almost a year when she first moved in with me. Of course it's a little more complicated than that, I'm just leaving out all the minute details, but she considers me moving out and paying rent a waste of resources because rent just goes in a hole and doesn't build equity, so moving back out and on my own has been an uphill climb of sorts.

It turns out however that my plan to move out triggered some ideas of her own. Right now she has a boyfriend that she is thinking of moving in with, but there's a full house of sorts in our apartment. Because she manages my Grandfather's building she gave the tenants living in the floor below us 6 months to move out. Since they are living month to month with no lease, plus they are only paying about half of what the going rate for a 3 bedroom apartment in the area they pretty much don't have any choice. She also made an offer to my step-dad, for him and his daughter (my sister) to move in to the other apartment, thus freeing the condo for me and the top floor apartment for my mom and her boyfriend. Because work has been slow as of late, he can't afford his share of the payments for the condo and since he's going to be living with my sister and doing all the painting and repairs of the apartment they are moving into, he gets to stay there rent-free. This also frees up space for a possible live-in caretaker for my Grandfather who is bedridden and is staying in another apartment downstairs.

So to sum it all up, it looks like I'll be moved back into the old bachelor pad by this summer and I think that really fucking cool. Anyway, I need to catch up on my sleep, I have a busy weekend planned ahead of me so bye for now...