Dude, I feel like I'm in a huge funk. Not the "I want to fling myself off a tall building" kind of funk (yes, I've been in that that kind of funk before) but more of the "To hell with everything, I want to stay in bed" kind of funk. This kind of funk is not good for my economic status because the earlier I get up and get my ass to work, the more hours I get to put in and the less late I have to stay at work to make up my hours.

I don't know what exactly is it about my job, but there are just so many things about it, the low pay, the lack of benefits, the lack of defined tasks that just make it seem like it is not something of my caliber. In a way I even feel that it's dragging me down. I know that ultimately this job is what I make of it, but for this moment I have no desire to make it anything more than what it is, something to get me by until something better comes along. I think I'll wait until my boss comes in from out of town in February before I take steps towards my departure. I figure it's the least I can do for giving me something to pass the time.

I need to get myself an alarm clock. I had one in the old bachelor pad before I had to give it up to my step dad who has been separated from my mom for the longest, but still keeps in contact with the family. It turns out around the time I got laid off, he broke up with his live-in girlfriend and needed a place to stay so we arranged for him to stay in the condo while I moved back into my old room at my mom's.

But anyway, since I lost my job I never really had a solid need for an alarm clock. I go to sleep whenever I want, I wake up whenever I wake up and that's that. Don't get me wrong, living without a schedule has it's cool points but ultimately it has made me a total, complete and utter slacker. If I want to make something out of my life I am going to ultimately ditch the whole slacker mentality and begin, in action to be a more responsible adult.

Old habits of course die hard, so I'm not going to start today, but my goal is by February I would have worked myself into a regular schedule. I have to wake up early and be out the door early either for an early workout or just getting into work early so I can get my workout in right after. If I could do a fulltime job and take night classes, then I could easily do this. I just need to pull my ass out of the funk. I can't stand the funk!

I could do this, I know I can, not too long ago I was a damn fucking machine, I was doing everything. It's time I got back on the saddle. I also need to get a plan going with finding a real job, you know one that has those cool benefits like health care and a salary above the poverty level. I'm thinking that maybe if I submit a job application and my resume to at least one job opening per day, eventually I'll find a company that will hire my ass. Anyway look at the time. I should like maybe take a shower and haul my ass off to work, yeah I think maybe that's a good plan for today. Uh-huh, yup get out of bed and hit that shower. Like right now... Um yeah, OK, until next time... =p