My grades finally posted for the last quarter. I got an A- grade for both classes, which is not too bad considering I didn�t quite put in the effort I should have. For one class it didn�t really matter anyway since it was a prerequisite class and the only one I could not have waived. I would have only needed a B- to meet the requirement and it wouldn�t count towards my graduate GPA. It irks me slightly however that the A- in my graduate class totally threw off my GPA, which dropped from a 4.0 to a 3.85 but I suppose something that perfect wasn�t meant to last considering my somewhat slacker mentality. If I really wanted to maintain that 4.0, I should have forgone the weekend (and occasionally weekday) socializing and the drinking and instead I should have paid much more attention to my homework and I should have been much more prepared for my exams. It�s cool though, I don�t want to be one of those geeks whose only focus in life is school. Although it won�t be perfect I�ll definitely have the grades to graduate and if I keep at it with the A�s and the A-�s, I�ll have a high enough GPA to impress potential employers.

Now for another part of my life that I�ve been somewhat neglecting and that is female companionship. I have to admit that me swearing off females as a New Year�s resolution is somewhat of a cop out. Sure going to work full-time and taking 2 graduate courses per quarter takes time and dedication, but for me it's much less about the lack of time and much more about the lack of confidence. I know somewhere deep down that if I really wanted to do something like say start dating, I don�t think that it should be such a huge problem for me, it's just all in my fucking head. Like I said before it's all just a matter of having enough confidence and actually doing something about it.

I kind of came to that realization when one of my cousin�s best friends was coming off a semi-rebound almost a year ago. I won�t go into too much detail here because there are way too many people involved and I�m going to have to come up with stupid nicknames to keep track of them all without giving away their identity. Fuck that. What I will say is that I had the chance to date this really cute girl who had brains on top of it all (an awsome yet deadly combo in my book) and I fucking dropped the ball by trying to play it a little too cool and some other guy picked up the ball and just ran with it. It�s not that I�m totally bitter about it because I think he�s a really cool and overall nice guy and he�s really been through the wringer with the previous chick he was with.

Still I can�t be just sitting around waiting for the right time or the right moment or for the right person to wander into my life. Things don't always fall into your lap like that. Sometimes a guy just has to take some risks and just go for it and I�ve totally not been doing that. You know it�s weird, maybe I have Spring Fever or something but Derrick really needs to get out and have some fun. So I�m going to do just that. It�s not really about picking up the most chicks and seeing how often I can get laid. It�s more about me having a little confidence in myself. I know I�m cute and attractive enough in theory, females are paying attention, I just have to follow through, put some of that theory into practice and actually get something going with some of these females. Well anyway work is almost over so I think I�ll wrap stuff up here and get the hell out. This weekend is going to be cool though, just stay tuned, same bat channel...